very funny PLASTIC WIDOW...MODELGURU\'S WIFE
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very funny PLASTIC WIDOW...MODELGURU\'S WIFE 11 years, 5 months ago #1

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[size= x-small]    My wife wrote this a while back it is quite funny and true



  My husband and I were enjoying the rare treat of having dinner out alone; (rare because we have two teenage
daughters at home and one grown daughter who lives a half mile away).    I was deriving great pleasure from the time
alone as well as from the stimulating adult conversation.   One of the things I have always loved about my husband is his
ability to carry on an intellectual conversation on nearly any subject imaginable. He is well read and well informed so the
potential topics of conversation are virtually limitless.  We were discussing, without interruption from the children or the
dog, everything from the state of the plants in the yard to the state of the world.  We had just begun a fascinating dialogue
on the ozone layer and global warming when…the inevitable occurred.  The conversation suddenly turned to plastic.  Yes,
it’s true.  I am a “Plastic Widow.”  My husband is an avid modeler and this means that every aspect of our lives is
somehow connected to modeling and, hence, to plastic.  

      Never heard of a Plastic Widow?  Oh come, now.  Certainly you are familiar with Football Widows, Basketball
Widows, or Hockey Widows?  These terms refer to the wives or girlfriends of men who are so obsessed with these sports
that they have had to make allowances for their husbands’ passion in their lives and homes in order to keep the
relationship in existence.  A Plastic Widow endures the same fate with the exception that, instead of sharing her husband’s
attention with sporting events, she shares her husband with his undying devotion to modeling.

           Most of us know that our husbands are plastic junkies long before they become our husbands. If this is the case, we
have no one to blame but ourselves for our predicament.  We knew what we were getting into.  For instance:

*Plastic knows no season; there will be modeling year round.

*We will be shown each piece at each stage and expected to say, “Wow!” and marvel at his craftsmanship.

*We might as well add plastic, glue, and paint to the budget.  It will be purchased; resistance is futile.

*We must lower our expectations of organization.  It’s not a mess, it’s a project.

*There are hobby shops in every vacation spot you may visit.

*There will be shows and competitions at which we will stand around and…well…stand around.

*Plastic junkies are afflicted with “modeler’s disease.”  They buy far more kits than they will ever build.  There is no cure   
and they wouldn\'t’t take it if there was one.

     And last, but not least, every single topic of conversation can and will be related, in some way, shape, or form, to
plastic modeling.

     That reminds me…wondering how a discussion on global warming morphed into a conversation about plastic?  Any
Plastic Widow knows that this was actually a short trip.  Global warming is responsible for the deterioration of the ozone
layer.  The depletion of the ozone layer has led to scientific research on methods of producing plastic that are more
environmentally friendly.  Implementation of these new methods of production will cost the model companies more and,
consequently, the increase will be passed on to the consumer and the price of model kits will go up.  So, it stands to reason
that global warming is responsible for the rising cost of the tools of the trade for our passionate modelers.  Any questions?
         
     While all of this may sound rather overwhelming, the true Plastic Widow knows that, while his eyes may light up at the
sight of \'78 Corvette Sport Coupe or a Panzer Battalion Series kit, his heart still beats for the woman who stands by him as
the winners are called out at the show.  He knows that she is the one who will be beaming with pride when he is handed
the award or the one who will tell him how his piece was much better and should have won when his name is passed
over.  She is his biggest fan and his sounding board.  She pretends to understand what he explains about his plans for his
next build.  The Plastic Widow is a woman who loves a man who loves to model. If she is wise, she will use this to her
advantage.  Remember…for every kit or supply of paint, every bottle of glue or package of after-market supplies that is
purchased, therein lies leverage for that pair of shoes, that new outfit, or that dinner out that of which she has been
dreaming. Of course, the conversation during dinner will always turn to plastic, but, hey, we Plastic Widows knew that
would happen all along.  We’re used to it.




Last Edit: 11 years, 5 months ago by Modelguru.
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